Yesterday the doctors came into Mom’s room to report that the transplant didn’t take.  We were devastated.  They said they were awaiting the results of further testing to come up with “Plan B”.  It was the worst day ever.

This morning they came into the room smiling.  Further DNA tests showed that “failure” is too strong a word for what is going on with the transplant.  Mom’s bone marrow is 88% HERS and 12% MINE.  This chimera effect could mean that my 12%  is on its way OUT or on its way IN.

So it remains a waiting game.  The doctors are going to meet on Tuesday to discuss what happens next.  If my marrow is on the way IN, they will probably do a “boost” using my stem cells.

Yesterday I scared everyone to death– because the doctors scared us to death– but maybe we’re nowhere near the end of this.  We’re deep in the middle, and my brave Mom who has already faced 45 days in the hospital is facing many more weeks there.

One thing I know– this fight is NOT over.

Lately (I’m sure because of the stress) I find myself thinking a lot about my childhood.  How safe it was, how happy– I see my Mom in my mind’s eye in her rose garden in Virginia Beach–in every memory it is summer.  I’ve been listening to music from that time too, trying to bring back those feelings.  Today’s selection is from Seals and Croft, because “like Columbus in the olden days, we must gather all our courage, sail our ships out on the open seas and CAST AWAY OUR FEARS.”

We May Never Pass this Way Again (click here if you’d like to hear it)

Life, so they say, is but a game and we let it slip away.
Love, like the Autumn sun, should be dyin’ but it’s only just begun.
Like the twilight in the road up ahead, they don’t see just where we’re goin’.
And all the secrets in the Universe, whisper in our ears
And all the years will come and go, take us up, always up.
We may never pass this way again. We may never pass this way again.
We may never pass this way again.

Dreams, so they say, are for the fools and they let ’em drift away.
Peace, like the silent dove, should be flyin’ but it’s only just begun.
Like Columbus in the olden days, we must gather all our courage.
Sail our ships out on the open sea. Cast away our fears
And all the years will come and go, and take us up, always up.